Missing Life

Why do we look back at yearbooks, old pictures and other items from our personal histories and feel depressed or excited?
Those of us who become depressed likely do so because we remember the times when things were better in our lives, or we had a better understanding of ourselves, perhaps more hope for the future. In my case, any time I see anything about high schools or see anyone my own age being successful I have that feeling, I am sad. I feel like I have done nothing productive with my life and my number of positive qualities are becoming smaller and smaller as I become more bothered by my state of life. I need things to change, I need to feel inspired again. I need to get out of bed each day with a purpose and a plan.
For you that may have become excited at reviewing your histories, it is likely somewhere between you are feeling reminiscent emotions that have stayed with you that you can still feel because you yourself haven’t changed or perhaps you used to be a total fuck up and now your life is together. Either way, be happy.
So, what is the point of this documented grand synaptic misfire of the day? I don’t really feel that great about my current state of life. I want to seek a real job where I can have responsibilities and actually do something productive with my time. At the same time, I want to hang out with people my own age (and a little older, since I still have some intellectual maturity intact) again. I want to experience life again, not just spend 4 days per week in a classroom and 3 days a week sitting alone in my room.