Faith, or Crisis Thereof

If this works out the way it’s supposed to, this will be my final post on the topic of religion (at least for this ranting period).

Over the past few weeks I have come into closer contact with religion than I have in a long time. From a conversation about indoctrination of youth with Chris to having a pleasant conversation with a pair of Mormon missionaries (yes, I mean it) to having an impassioned discussion about evolution vs. creationism in my History & Systems course (PSYC 400) it has been a busy few weeks for me in terms of philosophical and theological thoughts.

What do I believe? I don’t know.

I believe that organized religions try too hard to indoctrinate and to convert, but that isn’t exactly something substantial to build a religious platform on.  My childhood was not exactly filled with religion. My parents did not go to church and I never went to church. When filling out forms requiring a religious preference, I didn’t have enough time to think about it, I just bubbled N/A or anything the seemed benign (I think I used Baptist on an AP test once). I have never had a religious identity. If I were going to try to fit in, obviously I would pick some variant of Christianity and go with it, but somehow just picking a religion and going with it seems wrong. It seems immoral to declare myself something that I am not, and that I have not been able to form a belief in.

Most recently I have associated myself most closely with being Agnostic, because I can not resolve the concept of a God, but at the same time I am not willing to wholly reject the possibility. I can not resolve how the universe began. I suppose I believe it started with a compressed orb of matter and energy, which rapidly expanded. The belief exists without any explanation of how that matter and energy got there or in what material or construct that matter and energy were suspended. This inability to resolve these issues concerns me because I like for everything to make sense. This inability to resolve also means that in some way I need some type of faith, but I have difficulty selecting one because I do not know how to validate one with any sense of reliability.

Organized religion is probably the leading cause for why I have not done more research and talked more about my lack of a religion. I have no problem with any religion, but it is hard to embrace something when it feels like it is being forced on me, or worse, when people try to convert me while at the same time insult me because I do not happen to believe in their particular religion. With this type of response it is difficult to figure out anything about the religion, other than to get the feeling that I want nothing to do with a people that are that rabid in their beliefs. I am happy for people who have found something to believe in, but I do not think that anyone should ever have to deal with beliefs being thrust upon them.

I believe that the universe exists.
I believe that sentient beings should do no harm to each other.
I do not presently have a belief in "God”.


“What does God need with a space-ship?”